


Don't You Want This

by sleepysweaters



Category: Gravity Falls, Heathers: The Musical - Murphy & O'Keefe
Genre: Alternate Universe - Heathers, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, BillDip, First Time writing Smut, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Smut, Human Bill Cipher, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, M/M, poorly written smut, the ending is kinda shitty but idc
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-19
Updated: 2017-06-19
Packaged: 2018-11-15 23:20:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,879
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11241372
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sleepysweaters/pseuds/sleepysweaters
Summary: Dipper is exhausted and it's due to murder.  How is Bill not tired from any of this?  How hasn't he cracked?All Dipper knows is that he cracks, enough for the both of them.-Heathers au for billdip.  Dipper as Veronica and Bill as JD.  Takes place during seventeen, but I added some stuff bc the song is boring when you're trying to write it.





	Don't You Want This

**Author's Note:**

> there's smut in this, and it's probably poorly written.  
> i haven't really read over this bc i've written it like 4 times & i mean like 4 different versions  
> enjoy dude

Dipper was exhausted, his eyes were barely staying open. He couldn’t sleep anymore, every time his eyes closed he saw death over and over again. It was due to murder, and he didn’t realize how hard it was to kill people.

He took a deep sigh and suddenly his face was in his hands, and tears streamed down his face. Bill at him shocked before running over to the boy. He crouched in front of Dipper’s bed, holding the brunette’s hands in his owns.

“Pine Tree, what’s wrong?” Bill asked, his voice full of worry. Dipper cried harder, Bill’s voice made him cry constantly. He wasn’t tired, he thought it was all normal.

“I’m tired, Bill!” Dipper screamed, his head shot up and he was glowering at the blonde boy. Bill looked taken aback. “Why do we have to keep killing people? What are we gaining?”

“We’re damaged! I’m trying to get rid of the assholes trying to tear us apart! We have to show them that they can’t mess with our love!” Bill screamed back and Dipper shoved his shoulders. Bill fell to the ground hard, and Dipper was still glaring at him.

Bill retreated to the other side of the room, his face harboring heartbreak. Silence fell between them, and Dipper began to stare at the wall blankly. He looked like if someone spoke, he’d go off the deep end, and Bill couldn’t help but glance from the floor to his boyfriend.

Wait were they even boyfriends anymore? Dipper had shoved Bill pretty hard, signifying that he didn’t want him around. Should Bill just get up and leave? Is that what his little Pine Tree wanted? Was he even allowed to call him that anymore?

Just like Bill’s thoughts, Dipper’s mind was racing as well. He couldn’t stop thinking of Bill’s words, and how he was going to throw up from sleep deprivation. His eyes began to well with tears again, and he stood up; staring at Bill.

“Fine, we’re damaged! But I’m not special or different like you, and that doesn’t mean you get to choose how lives or dies!” Dipper yelled, and Bill reacted as if he hadn’t heard a word.

Dipper felt tears run down his face quickly, and he choked on the salty water at the sight of Bill. The noise made Bill flinch, and he had to fight the urge to go save his prince.

“I want to be normal with you! I love you, Bill! Don’t you get that? I wouldn’t be here today if I didn’t love you! I just want to watch shitty movies, bake some brownies, and sneak some beers. But I guess you don’t want that with me,” Dipper yelled, but his voice gradually grew weaker until he crumbled to the ground, sobbing.

Bill looked at his boyfriend with sheer heartbreak on his face. Tears began to well up in his eyes, and his mouth was agape. He didn’t know what to say, and that’s what killed Dipper. All he had wanted was a reciprocation of feelings, but all he received was silence.

“I just want to be seventeen, again. I want to smile with you, and cuddle on the couch. I want to take photos with you, ones where we’re kissing. I want to whisper I love you in the mornings whenever you stay over. Don’t you want any of that with me?” Dipper asked, and his sobbing only intensified.

Bill crawled over the crumbled boy, letting his instinct take over. He wiped the tears from Dipper’s cheeks, and the brunette’s eyes flickered up to Bill. The taller boy looked away, realizing what he was doing.

“People constantly hurt us, and end up vanishing when you need them most,” Bill said softly, and Dipper smiled at the sound of his voice.

“It really fucking blows,” Dipper said before kissing Bill’s neck softly and innocently. Bill smiled down at the boy, and sighed.

“We try to take deep breaths, or maybe buy some new clothes,” Bill said and Dipper chuckled at the comment, his head on Bill’s chest. He heard his soothing heartbeat, and Bill’s head was slightly on his prince’s head.

“We could go camping, or hike some trails,” Dipper said and suggested and Bill chuckled at that. His fingers made their way to the brunette’s hair, softly combing through the curly mess.

“Pine Tree, I know that you love nature, that’s how you got the nickname. But I hate nature, so let’s play some poker instead,” Bill said and then suddenly the blonde was sobbing. He completely broke down, and the hands on his yellow polo gripped the material.

Dipper looked up at him, before releasing the shirt with one hand to wipe the tears cascading down his boyfriend’s face. He kissed Bill’s jaw, before bringing Bill eye level to him.

“What about prom night?” Dipper asked, not wanting to lose Bill again. The silence from the taller boy earlier had nearly killed him.

“I want to dance with you forever, and wear matching suits,” Bill cried out as he gazed into his boyfriend’s brown eyes.

“Never stop looking in my eyes,” Dipper said, cupping the blonde’s cheek. He wanted the boy to know that he was there, that he wasn’t going to be leaving anytime soon. He wanted to be his rock.

“How could I when I love them so much? They light up the room before you even smile. They unfold all your emotions, and leave me breathless every time I see them. How could I ever look away?” Bill asked, he squeezed his eyes and more tears fell down his face.

Bill’s head fell onto Dip’s shoulder, and his arms went around the smaller boy’s waist. He held on to the boy, as if Dipper was going to disappear right there. Almost as if confessing love meant that people would leave.

“What’s the matter, rayon de soleil?” Dipper asked and Bill shivered at the way the brunette spoke French. Then Dipper’s fingers were running through the blonde’s hair.

“I want to do everything with you, but I’m a monster,” Bill choked out through the tears. Dipper’s fingers started scratching behind his ears.

“Why are you calling yourself a monster?” Dipper asked, kissing the blonde’s hair. Every kiss he gave Bill was soft and innocent. Always full of love and compassion.

“I’ve been killing people for selfish reasons. I just wanted us to be happy and no one hurt us.”

“Baby,” Dipper said as he pulled Bill’s head up to look at the brunette. Bill looked at him with tearful eyes and a shaky figure. Dipper pressed a kiss on the other boy’s lips, soft and warm. “We all make mistakes, but we can change our ways. I love you.”

“I just want to be seventeen with you. I want you so bad,” Bill cried and Dipper pressed a kiss on his forehead.

“I’ll only stay if I’m what you choose. Stop murdering people, and we can live happily ever after,” he said and Bill opened his eyes to see Dipper not meeting his eyes.

Silence fell on the room once again, and Bill’s intense gaze wouldn’t stop. Dipper could feel the look burning his skin. Then Bill took the boy’s face in his hands and kissed him. Dipper immediately melted into it, because it was reflex to fall into the blonde’s embrace.

“Of course I choose you. I need you in my life, please don’t leave me. You’re my Pine Tree, the nature loving fuck,” Bill said and then kissed the brunette once again.

Dipper’s fingers tangled themselves into the curly blonde hair. This was as intimate as it normally got, because since Dipper’s drunk adventure, he had been terrified of having sex again. This time felt different though, it felt like it wasn’t a drunk adventure for either of them.

It felt like love for him, and he didn’t know how Bill felt, but he felt his heart pound in his chest at the mere thought of Bill. Bill kissed Dipper’s jawline, not doing anything else. He knew how his little prince felt about doing things that weren’t discussed, so he made sure he was slow and only kissed him.

“Let’s just be seventeen,” Dipper whispered and Bill mumbled something into Dipper’s skin. Dipper put his jaw down so the taller boy could explain himself.

“I want to be with you tonight,” Bill said, he was soft and gentle. Dipper stared at him with some admiration and kissed him once again. Bill’s breath hitched in his throat at Dipper making the first move again.

Bill remembered being woken up two weeks ago by the small boy, demanding that he had to fuck Bill into oblivion. Dipper pushed Bill down to the ground, still kissing him. Everyone assumed that the taller boy would be dominant, but they hadn’t met the real Dipper Pines.

“Do you want to do this?” Dipper asked, his voice dropped and Bill could’ve came right then, but held his composure.

“I mean if you want to,” Bill said, his voice cracked and the smirk Dipper gave in returned almost killed the blonde. Dipper obviously felt Bill’s growing problem, he was straddling him, but got off of him and smiled at him sweetly.

“So we’re going to watch movies, right?” Dipper asked, his voice was still deep and sultry. Bill nodded and got up quickly. He was only like this around the brunette.

“What are we doing?” Bill asked as he sat on the edge of the bed. Dipper looked at him and smiled.

“What do you want to do?” Dipper asked, noticing that Bill still had a boner. “Do you need some help with that?”

A chill went up Bill’s spine at those words and Dipper pulled at the collar of Bill’s trench coat. He was guided further onto the bed, and Dipper kissed the blonde boy again.

Bill moaned into Dipper’s mouth, and the brunette smirked into the kiss. Pine Tree’s tongue glided over Bill’s lips and into his mouth, and that’s when he really started moaning.

“Moan all you want to, my family is out visiting some co-workers,” Dipper told the taller boy. His voice didn’t sound like it came from him at all.

Dipper’s mouth went down Bill’s neck, sometimes he’d nibble in certain parts just to make a small mark. He stripped Bill of his shirt and coat, and pushed him down onto the bed. Bill moans filled the room as Dipper left opened mouth kisses down his torso and then back up, leaving bite marks in random places.

“What do you want me to do?” Dipper asked, his eyes were dark as he stared up at Bill. The blonde felt himself getting close just from the sight of Dipper like this. He was back to two weeks ago when the boy showed up drunk and high, but now he was sober.

“Fuck me,” Bill said and Dipper laughed, his dark eyes seemed to just continue to become more and more sunken.

“Maybe,” Dipper said and then he undid Bill’s pants in a second. He yanked them down and Bill’s dick was pushing the fabric of his boxers. Dipper mouthed his dick through the fabric, and Bill’s moaned filled the room.

“Prince, fuck, Dip,” Bill moaned out and his head lied in the pillows, his eyes squeezed tight from pleasure.

Dipper slowly removed the other boy’s alien boxers and licked his lips at the sight of his dick. Bill almost came, again.

“Put your legs over the side of the bed,” Dipper ordered and Bill did it quickly. Dipper moved to the floor, in between the blonde’s legs. 

He licked the head softly, almost as if it was ice cream. Pre-cum had been leaking for a while, and Dipper was licking it up. His open mouth hovered over the head, and the heat of Dipper’s mouth made Bill beg for it.

“Oh, please just do it,” Bill moaned out, his hips buckling in until Dipper pressed a hand to keep them steady.

“Do you really want it?” Dipper asked, he bit his lip in curiosity and Bill’s moans filled the room as the hand on his hip began to move closer to his dick.

“Yes, please, baby,” Bill moaned and then Dipper put his dick in his mouth. He looked up at Bill to see if going up and down was any good.

What no one knew about Dipper was that he didn’t have sex or intimate relations with anyone like this. He watched porn, but nothing ever got him hard. It wasn’t that he wasn’t turned on, because he was, but he didn’t like the idea of touching himself. He was a giver, or that’s what he called himself.

Bill’s fingers tangled into the messy brown hair and Dipper started licking as he bobbed; Bill started to come undone. He was stuttering out moans, and his hair was sticking to his forehead from hot he was getting. Dipper felt accomplished that he could achieve this, but he was worried that the boy receiving would want to give back. 

Dipper really didn’t like sex, or being touched in that way. He was only like that when he was high, and that had been once. That was probably the only and final time he’d ever put a dick up his ass. He also didn’t want to put his dick in anyone’s ass, so he assumed that blow-jobs were okay.

“I’m going to come,” Bill moaned, and Dipper popped right off before Bill came on himself. Dipper got up and went to the bathroom to get a damp washcloth.  
When he returned to his room, Bill was staring at the ceiling. He was still naked, and looked at the still fully clothed Dipper Pines.

“Do you not want to have some pleasure?” Bill asked and Dipper shrugged.

“I’m not a fan of sex, I just like giving it I guess? Like the idea is gross to me, but I mean I don’t mind doing it. I think it’s called asexual or some shit. I don’t know, but blow-jobs are fun to give,” Dipper said calmly as he wiped Bill down.

“So you weren’t turned on during that?” Bill asked confused and Dipper stared at him curiously.

“I mean I was pretty turned on, but since I don’t really have a sex drive; my dick just doesn’t get hard. Why? Do you want me to fuck you into oblivion?” Dipper asked and Bill choked on his spit.

“That’s a little vulgar.”

“I literally just had your dick in my mouth, how is that vulgar?”

“Fair point.”

Bill put his boxers back on and hugged Dipper from behind. Dipper was folding Bill’s clothes as if they hadn’t just done something dirty.

“Can we do something?” Bill asked and Dipper looked at him with a disgusted look.

“I don’t want to fuck,” Dipper snapped and Bill raised his hands up in defense.

“I was going to suggest watching some shitty movie with cuddling, but damn, okay,” Bill said and Dipper grabbed his arm.

“Lay on the bed, I’m going to change into some pajamas,” he said and Bill smiled at him brightly before laying on the gray comforter.

He watched Dipper shed his shirt, and couldn’t help but stare at him. Bill felt like it should be illegal for someone to be so adorable and hot at the same time.

“Take a picture, it’ll last longer,” Dipper said, not turning around as he took off his pants. Bill got out his phone, and snapped a photo really quick of Dipper’s back. That was going to be his lock screen for sure.

Dipper plopped onto the bed, and grabbed the TV remote from the end of the bed. He pulled the blankets with him, so the two could just lay on the comforter together. Bill pulled him in between his legs as Dipper turned the TV on. He went through the channels, trying to find some shitty movie to watch.

“Do you think we’re going to last?” Bill asked softly and Dipper was quiet for a second.

“I hope so, I did suck your dick and ride you,” Dipper said and Bill’s face began to turn pink.

“Vulgar!”

“Yeah, I think we’ll last. Just don’t kill anyone,” Dipper said and Bill nodded. It was going to be hard, but he really didn’t want to lose his boyfriend.

“One day, I’m going to buy us tickets to go to Europe.”

“Bill, that’ll happen in 10 years.”

“So? We’ll be married and have three dogs.”

“What if I like cats?”

“We’ll have three dogs.”

Dipper finally found a movie, Sharknado. Bill started laughing at just the mention of it, his arms wrapping around Dipper. The brunette leaned back to put his head on his boyfriend’s chest. He took a deep breath, feeling peace for once in his life.

“Is this what it’s like to be 17?” Dipper asked and Bill chuckled.

“What do you mean?”

“Well like we confessed our love for each other during a fight, and then I sucked your dick. And now we’re watching Sharknado. Is this like what couples do usually?” Dipper asked and Bill laughed slightly.

“I wouldn’t know, you’re my first everything.”

“Man, that was gay.”

**Author's Note:**

> idk if that sex scene was any good, i read over it & cringed, but oh well


End file.
